Speaking of getting older...

Kirk is almost 30 :)... And by almost i mean he'll be 29 in 3 weeks.  He's looking forward to it. 

"CHERISH IT. SHTAY HERE ASH LONG ASH YOU CAAAAAAN"

Today my little sister, Katie, turned 15. Yeeeeeeesh! Soon she'll be driving, and then college, and then married and then I'll be a grandma-aunt. It's not just that my little tiny sisters are getting older, or the baby fever I've succumbed to, or the ample amounts of Wheel of fortune I've watched this year - I'm getting old.

<OH, REAL OLD ZEROS, BE QUIET! LET ME HAVE THIS>

I'm 27 going on 100. Here are some recent things that have happened that have really rubbed my face in the fact that I'm getting old:
-I go to bed at 8:30pm, I wake up at 4:55am
-I created a book club
-I seriously enjoy my book club
-I am grouchy at college kids doing what college kids do
-I spend my weekends doing chores and don't mind that at all

-TLC still really pumps me up at the gym

-I can't eat a cake for breakfast without gaining 8 pounds
-it takes 6 months to lose said cake pounds
-I can say, "remember that thing happened 10 years ago..." and I can use the word "decade"
-I've known people for more than 10 years
-I've been alive long enough to see Carson Daly go from MTV to the Today show.
-I really like coffee, beer, and wine. Good beer. Red wine.
-the next morning after ample beer and wine I am paralyzed for 24 hours.
-the thought of hard liquor is also paralyzing
-Sometimes I think about how the 90s weren't ten years ago
-I find myself saying, "my kid will NEVER do that." to all the kids who do things that kids do
-Life makes me sore
-The thought that some people on the earth have never seen the Indiana Jones movies makes me sad.
-My road rage has only gotten worse
-When I was unemployed I couldn't really see a reason not to have a drink at 3pm.
-Today I still kind of don't see a problem with the drink at 3pm
-I don't drink that much, camaaan.
-I really like being home and the effort to go out is (most of the time) too much
-I only know the original disney movies and kid shows on tv melt my brain (what happened to "hey arthur"

-I sent Kelly (my other sis, 13) a text today and she asked if I was being retro. Don't believe me?

-I spend all my money on vases to put shells in, and shelves to sit the vases on, in places all around my house
-kirk is more of a kermudgen than me, if you can believe it!!

This list is not to be confused with the wish to be 15 or even 18 again. Uhhh no. Actually, HELL NO. It's just maybe I'm more me than I've ever been. I'm an old, semi-drunk homebody who does DIY projects and waters her plants during the day, loves a good vanilla candle, and remembers all the good times and gawks at the unknown of the younger generation. And the fact that there's a younger generation still blows my mind.

Happy birthday to Katie, and here's to all my zero friends who secretly love all the things I do but won't admit it...yet.

(PS I swear I don't drink that much)

You don't understand

That is the thermometer inside my house. Notice it's maxed out. Are you wondering how I'm sleeping in that heat? Me too. Answer is that I'm not, hence, this grouchy post. 

It's hot. And wet. Like the inside of a packed gym where you feel other people's sweat on your face. 

Speaking of the gym, that ^ is the temp from my car while leaving the gym at 6:15 in the morning today. Add however many degrees for humidity and there you have it- 80+ before the sun is even up. Then the sun comes up and makes me want to move to Alaska. 

Shoot me.

Some of my zero readers might be like, "that's nothing- I live on the east coast/south/Arizona and it's always like that!"  What I say to you zeros is, I know. But your whole world is INSIDE. Work, home, malls, schools, and everything has a/c. In San Diego, we get hot every once and a while, but the county is known for the mild temperatures. We deal with the 2-3 days per season that suck.

It's been weeks of this. EVERYTHING WE DO IS OUTSIDE and almost no one has air conditioning because we don't need it. We spend enough $$$ living here that we don't need to pay even more to have cool air blow on us from time to time. 

"Oh, jordan," you zeros say, "you have the ocean right there so stop complaining!!" 

Have you ever tried to get to the beach with the rest of the 3.14 million San Diego county residents?? HAVE YOU?? Then don't talk to me about beach days. Although we did go last weekend. 

What I'm trying to say is this: let us bitch about the heat. It's about all we can do to move our bodies as little as possible, only using thumbs and phones to let the world know our pain. We want to live in San Diego, not Panama. You should know that we will also bitch when it rains because it makes my work commute hell on earth and, eff, what is up with rain anyway!??

<End of rant>

Long time no post

Dear zero friends,

Dudes. Things have been craY in my life. I haven't even opened my computer at home in like 6 weeks. I'm typing this out on my phone through the blogger app. The short version of things is that everything is great. Everyone is happy and healthy, except my zucchini which died a horrible death of white mold on every leaf/stalk(!??!). I tried to salvage the least moldy leaves and just ended up ripping out everything. Ripped out a damn piece of my heart.  Job has exceeded my expectations: I have business cards and i'm on the website.... o0o0o0h. School update soon(ish). Suffice to say, I passed the CBEST and I'm moving forward!

In other news, today I wore one of my "smart" blazers and ended up looking like I work in a lab. THE DOCTA IS IN!!! And I desperately need a haircut. 

garden update: my plant children

Day 1 vs Day 16

Isn't it amazing what a little sunshine, water, and an appropriate amount of love can do? My little garden is growing like crazy and I'm especially proud of the beans and peas that I grew from seeds.

What I've learned so far about my plant children:

• Squash is the crazy one who does steroids and you're worried about their future and whether their balls might shrink. I bought way too many for this tiny 13x5 space.
• The miracle of life is amazing. If I'm this excited about sprouts from seeds, I don't know how crazy I'll be when I have a baby (human seed!) (no this is not an announcement). So my seedlings are the needy but super impressive ones.
• Corn is a pimp and seems to grow an inch/day so obv they are the ones going through puberty. So far they think they know everything, and spoiler alert, they do.
• Lettuce is a water hog aka the guttons of the family. Like mother like plant children.
• Peppers (bell, habanero, and jalepeno) are the nerds who work really hard but have nothing on the outside to show for it (yet). I also may have planted them too close together so there's a chance they won't actually grow or fruit at all (smothering mom).
• Cilantro and Parsley are "Team Herb" and are totally potheads (get it, they're in pots). But they're doing great so I'm not going to rehab them or anything.
• Tomatoes are my athletes - competing against each other and turning out a bunch of tiny green fruits that I'm sure will be amazing once they ripen.

Well that's enough crazy for today. 

Side note: I planted flowers from seeds since the beans/peas were so easy/amazing. Updates on those in 10-16 days :)

sometimes things don't work out as you plan

....THEY'RE BETTER!

Sometimes blessings fall from the sky. And by sometimes I mean this has never happened to me before so this is the first time and it's great.

Let me explain...

Today I got a job offer from a law firm that I applied to in February - it turned out I didn't have quite the experience they were looking for so we parted ways and that was that. Story of my professional life. But you don't understand. Back when I first applied, I researched this firm from top to bottom because I knew I didn't want to end up in the situation I was in at Pite Duncan (too big, bad management, no end to the hamster wheel over a pit of fire). I watched all the videos, I looked at what services they offered their clients, I read reviews, I checked out the office, I googled some people for crying out loud. They seemed like a complete 180 to PD and on a whole other planet (nay, solar system!) from Instant Customer. On paper it was a dream company for me...kind of like what Google would be to people who work at Google or how someone in Hollywood who landed a role in a film by Spielberg would feel. It's a firm/company/family. They LOVE their employees and show it. It's an honest firm with real values and awards and pride and and and. Once I knew about them, that a place like that even exists and is in my realm of possibility, I wanted more than anything to work there. And when I didn't get the job I seriously decided that I didn't want to be a paralegal if I couldn't work for a place like that. End of story. So I made a new plan - to go back to school and teach. That was always my passion and I wasn't going to keep bouncing around trying to force myself, a seemingly square peg, to fit into another mediocre job. I am in charge of my own destiny!!!...destiny destiny....like how it would sound if you said that to the Grand Canyon.

 So here I am just this past Monday, unemployed but with a plan to go to PLNU and get my Masters of Arts in Teaching with my credential and off I go for the rest of my life. I mean, I just started this blog less than 30 days ago to chronicle this experience for crying out loud! And OUT OF THE CLEAR BLUE SKY I got an email from their recruiter saying that a position opened up and they were checking to see if I was still interested and doi I was still interested because this was my Mecca of Jobs.

Suffice to say, the interview went well and they called me today with the offer for a 4 year employment contract. I cried.

I cried because it was a relief. I cried because this means that how I see myself as a human and how I try to be as an employee are correct and that other people see it too. I cried because I know I can still go to school at night but now won't have to worry constantly about money. I cried because it literally felt like heaven opened up and rained down hugs for no other reason than because Jordan needed a hug. I cried because someone like me, who has had bad luck finding a place to belong, belongs. I cried because I just love Kirk so much and know this will alleviate the financial pressure he/we were going to be under for the foreseeable future. And I cried because I'm a tender soul and that's what I do.

I'm not giving up on being a teacher. I'm still going to school and will talk to some counselors about programs where I can get my masters and do all the classes for the credential without the student teaching (for the time being). I plan on giving this place a try and seeing how it goes. But from what I feel as of right now, I think it will be a prosperous and happy couple of years.

7 days

7 days until I take the CBEST. I'm finding that all the teachers I've talked to who've taken the test are like, "Oh, you can sleep through that test and pass! CAMAN!"

Well...I have this study book I've been using that takes you through the format and refreshes you on math you haven't thought about in 10 years so that's helpful. But otherwise, I'm pretty much on my own.

I've been on my own for a test before - I studied for, taught myself material, and PASSED the paralegal certification test in 2011. Still, there's nothing like waking up in the morning to the thought of factoring polynomials to really get your heart going.

Here's to June 20!